this is due to my not having any friends on live journal...why do i keep one then? well i s'pose its because a) i am a loser, used to have a bunch of friends who had these and this live journal used to be very active then through maybe in part some fault on my part the activity on everyones live journal dwindled away, now i am stuck here trying to hold onto the past wich i have to say was very fun and full of passion, care free, back when we couldnt choose between all of the options of what to do that day, night, morning....now, the only thing left for me on live journal is b) to be an eye, all i do is visit my girl friends LJ, and she doesnt even update her LJ very often anyways, and i read her posts, even though i know whats going on in her life because we spend everry moment of our waking non working lifes together. uhg i am sad.
i guess at the moment i am suffering in part by boredom and being all lonely reminesant of the past.
i miss my friends, cara and i hung out with my oldest and bestest friendin the whole wide world last night on the fourth, we went to his moms house wich we do every year and its been this way for i dont know how long now. he hangs out with his girl friend all the time, myke was there wich he was part of the OG crew. we hung out ate and made some funny jokes then went back to marcus's house and pretty much all fell asleep on the couch. pretty freaking exciting right? we suck! i got today off so that i can go out and get comepletely plasterd. ideally last night i would have hung out with the whole crew, Marcus, Myke, Brian, Casey, James, Andy, Andre, Pierre, Jeb, Amanda, Jeremy, Joey, and made a huge rucous, we all would have gotten drunk and pssibly did some stuff frowned upon by seociety but we woulda did it with heart and n secret and it would have ment the world because we would have did it together, like two drunks and a dong, two robbers and being gunned down by the cops. but instead everyone with a g/f was with their g/f the ones without were being cool guys. save/myke was with us. we didnt act like bar room heros or youthful party animals we were sober drunks and robbers who servived and now rot aparty in jail. we hung out got fat and went to sleep. early. i dont know if i hate it, ifi amjust fresh in this mood i am in or amjust having a hardtime moving onto the next scene of this movie. something powerful, something needs to happen, something dramatic- not tramatic- some actiaon or event needs to happen to pump some life back into us. make me feel alive, i feel like gravity is taking its toll on me, arg! i dont know. maybe we are all growed up and i didnt notice till now. maybe its a good thing, maybe i feel like i am just begingin my evolution while everyone else has already evolved?
ah whatever. i hope we go to the concert saterday and have wayyy tooo much fun. i hope we're recless i hope we're crazy.
i hung out with an old friendabout a week ago. she was there when i was crazy we had a chanceto talkaboutit i have noticed how much i have become different, reserved, insomeways shy. in my mind- a pussy.
ok i am done rambling.
now cara come here right this second so we can eat some ephing hot dogs!
or we can go to the fox and get really drunk? eh? howabout it?